Good morning, and thanks for tuning into 420.60 STOKE FM! It appears you’re heading out on a backcountry ski mission and we’ve got a great program lined up for you today. Flip to station 90.30 THE PITS for running analysis on weather/snowpack/terrain/trip plan.
First up, at 0600, “Left, Right, Left, Right, Left, Right.” Settle into this perennial favorite to start your morning. A calming, meditative trance that’s just barely indistinguishable from a sleep state and ideal for dawn patrol.
At 0700, we bring you “Sunrise: The Untold Story.” Sure, there’s a sunrise every morning, but you haven’t seen this one yet. Let the dawn of the new day wash over you as you ponder your Instagram caption.
By 0800, if you’re wondering, “Wait, Do I Like These Boots?” well—this upcoming hour of drama is for you. No, no you don’t. But you do love those skis. And your ski partner. And that tree. Also that tree. That tree, too. There’s lots of nice trees. Nice enough to forget how much you hate your boots? Tune in and find out!
0900 means it’s time for the hit classic “Snack Analysis: What Snacks Does My Partner Have? What Do I Have to Trade?” Our experts weigh in on the fuels you’ve stashed in your backpack. We put it all out on the table—including the smushed meal bar that’s been in your bag for more than a season in case of emergency.
Let the chatter fade away at 1000 with “Ahhhh, the Sound of Silence.” Turn it up!
We’ll continue the mellow vibes at 1100 with “Glory Be: Is this Really Real?” You can’t believe your eyes, can you? We’re here to tell you, yes, it is real, so now you can stop bothering your ski partner with this question.
You’ve waited long enough for this fan favorite: At 1200, we bring you, “All of the Things I Am Going to Eat After This.” We’ll run through the mental Rolodex of all the places in town that deliver. Full steam ahead… to dinner!
At 1300, enjoy the experimental “Just the Numbers Between 53 and 73 Over and Over For Some Reason.” It doesn’t make sense, but it’s okay, we guess. Besides, you’re bootpacking right now and it’s too difficult to ponder anything else more worthwhile.
1400’s program speaks for itself: “Wow! Would You Look at That View? We Are All So Lucky to Be Here Right Now.”
1500 “That Was Awkward: A Retrospective.” One of the programs our audience hates most, but we keep it scheduled daily because it’s hilarious for us! We’ll mine your memory for your most uncomfortable, embarrassing moments, and recount them in vivid detail on public radio.
At 1600, settle in with “One Full Hour of Only the Word ‘Despacito.” If you’re not a Spanish speaker, you’ll love this repeating loop of just the one word of the chorus from the Puerto Rican summer 2017 anthem, which is still the most-played video on YouTube. Des.. pa… cito. Na na na na na na na na.
1700 “All of the Things I Am DEFINITELY Going to Eat After This.” Because who doesn’t love a re-run? This time, with sunset vibes.
By 1800, it’s dark again and you’re back at your rig. Slip out of those boots. Regard them with love, even though you hate them, because they got you out there, and then back here. Crack a cold one, close your peepers, and rewind that perfect day, with a perfect soundtrack. Then, let’s go get some curry.