We did it, America. After years of wishing, hoping, praying to Hollywood Snow Gods, who we presume live at the base of Big Bear, the film industry heard our calls and gave us a ski film that will premiere on a big screen near you.
Did they go with a Plake biopic starring Jarred Leto? No. Or what about a dramatic interpretation of Deep: The Story of Winter and Future of Snow starring Colin Hanks as Powder Features Editor Porter Fox running through Europe with a leather-bound notebook as he dodges angry conservatives hell bent on preventing Fox reporting on climate change? No, though I would definitely go see that film.
Instead, friends, we get Eddie The Eagle. And I for one am damn glad about it. The United Kingdom, once the laughing stock of winter sports, is filled with hardcore skiers the likes one could find in a backwoods bar in Montana. It’s just they have better manners. Today skiers like James “Woodsy” Woods and Paddy Graham regularly appear on podiums and collect Powder Awards on behalf of their countrymen. They make the dry slope ski bums at the bar back in Britain quite proud. Before them, there was Eddie Edwards.
Edwards in 1988 became the first skier to represent Great Britain in Olympic ski jumping. His story, which I will not ruin in this space, takes place in Lake Placid, New York, as he trains with a bespectacled eye on the Calgary Winter Olympics.
The trailer sets this film up for an Oscar. Funny Brits skiing down dry slope, falling over in formation on live TV and a father-figure telling a young eaglet “YOU ARE NOT AN ATHLETE.” Enter Hugh Jackman, a stand-in for skiing’s entire culture—a drinking, disrespectful champion with a heart of gold. From there, the film goes all Rocky inspirational music and, well, I’m sold. Take my money.
Wolverine as a skier is fantastic. Eddie The Eagle lands in theaters on April 1.