Week In Review: Hermann Maier Coaching Austrian National Soccer Team

Wallisch needs new skis, Bud Light invades Crested Butte, and Donkey Kong skiing

The best part about this photo are the mad Photoshop skills involved. Hermann Maier, ladies and gentlemen.
Mental Coach Hermann Maier, ladies and gentlemen.

Austrian soccer team hires Hermann Maier as mental coach

Things are about to get mental in the Austrian national soccer team locker room. Searching for a little added motivation in lieu of European Championships qualifying, the squad has called upon legendary badass skier Hermann Maier for an extra boost. The Herminator will serve as mental coach throughout the campaign, running athletes through a circuit of drills that will include solving Sudoku puzzles while taking slalom gates to the shins and singing the national anthem during roller skate reenactments of Maier’s 1998 Olympic downhill run, two day after this craziness. #Herminating

Bud Light takes over Crested Butte

Apparently that fantasy town, Whatever U.S.A., that Bud Light has been jamming down our throats all summer is actually happening in real life Crested Butte. HA! Reports say that the Anheuser-Busch paid CB $500,000 to take over the town and film commercials, but I think they really missed their golden opportunity here. They should have just given the locals that $500,000 in Bud Light, a few kiddie pools, and a handful of flamingo lawn ornaments, and filmed the aftermath. Way more entertaining television, guaranteed.

How Powder Hounds train in the offseason

Get the goods, big fella!

Tom Wallisch in the hunt for new ski sponsor

In the biggest decision since…well…The Decision… Tom Wallisch is courting ski companies this week and no one is really sure where he’ll end up. After leaving SCOTT Sports this week, Wallisch posted an Instagram shredding park on a pair of blank white shredsticks, causing an Internet firestorm that singlehandedly shut down Newschoolers, Facebook, and Reddit at the same time (okay, not really, but it kind of felt like it). So where will Tommy Walnuts land? The anticipation is killing me.

Donkey Kong skiing

So this is the coolest summer ski edit ever, right? Just charging down a sidewalk on your planks and rolling trash barrel jibs like Diddy Kong. There’s some serious creativity going on here. Somewhere the Real SkiFi kids are shaking their heads they didn’t come up with this one first.

Kiwis crush NZ Freeski Open

Janina Kuzma and Charlie Lyons took women’s and men’s top honors in the season’s first noteworthy big mountain comp. Here’s the video evidence, complete with some hairy lines and one really big Kosak.

French ski flick fest, High Five!

The trailers are rolling in and ski porn season is upon us, but those creative types across the pond took a different approach for France’s annual flick fest, High Five Festival. Check out this cinema-inspired bit and see how many skier cameos you can pick out. First person to spot them all gets seven jellybeans and a half-used Subway punchcard. Bon chance!